Listening Is an Art Not a Skill and Thus Individuals Cannot Be Trained to Be Better Listeners

7 MIN READ

Agile Listening

Hear What People Are Really Proverb

Listening is one of the most important skills you can take. How well y'all listen has a major bear on on your job effectiveness, and on the quality of your relationships with others.

For instance:

• Nosotros listen to obtain information.
• We listen to understand.
• We listen for enjoyment.
• We heed to learn.

Given all the listening that nosotros practise, you would think we'd be good at information technology! In fact, almost of us are not, and enquiry suggests that nosotros only remember betwixt 25 percentage and fifty pct of what we hear, equally described past Edgar Dale'south Cone of Experience. That means that when you lot talk to your boss, colleagues, customers, or spouse for 10 minutes, they pay attention to less than half of the chat.

Turn it around and it reveals that when yous are receiving directions or being presented with information, you aren't hearing the whole message either. You hope the of import parts are captured in your 25-50 percent, but what if they're non?

Clearly, listening is a skill that nosotros can all do good from improving. By becoming a better listener, you can improve your productivity, besides as your ability to influence, persuade and negotiate. What's more, you'll avoid conflict and misunderstandings. All of these are necessary for workplace success!

Click here to view a transcript of this video.

Tip:

Good communication skills require a high level of self-awareness. Agreement your own personal mode of communicating will get a long way toward helping you to create good and lasting impressions with others.

About Active Listening

The way to improve your listening skills is to practice "active listening." This is where you make a conscious try to hear not only the words that another person is saying just, more chiefly, the complete message being communicated.

In social club to practise this you must pay attending to the other person very carefully.

You cannot let yourself to go distracted by whatever else may be going on around you, or by forming counter arguments while the other person is all the same speaking. Nor tin you lot allow yourself to go bored, and lose focus on what the other person is maxim.

Tip:

If you're finding it especially hard to concentrate on what someone is saying, try repeating their words mentally every bit they say them. This will reinforce their message and aid you to stay focused.

To enhance your listening skills, you need to permit the other person know that you are listening to what they're proverb.

To empathize the importance of this, ask yourself if yous've ever been engaged in a chat when you wondered if the other person was listening to what you lot were saying. Y'all wonder if your message is getting across, or if information technology'southward fifty-fifty worthwhile continuing to speak. Information technology feels like talking to a brick wall and it's something you lot want to avert.

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Acknowledgement tin be something as simple as a nod of the head or a simple "uh huh." You aren't necessarily like-minded with the person, yous are merely indicating that you are listening. Using trunk language and other signs to acknowledge yous are listening tin can also assist you lot to pay attention.

Try to respond to the speaker in a way that will encourage them to continue speaking, so that you can get the information that you need. While nodding and "uh huhing" says you're interested, an occasional question or comment to epitomize what has been said besides communicates that yous are listening and understanding his message.

Tip:

Be aware that active listening tin can give others the impression that yous agree with them fifty-fifty if you don't. It'due south too of import to avoid using active listening every bit a checklist of actions to follow, rather than actually listening. It may help to practice Mindful Listening if you find that yous lose focus regularly.

Becoming an Active Listener

There are v key agile listening techniques you can utilise to help you become a more effective listener:

one. Pay Attention

Give the speaker your undivided attending, and acknowledge the message. Recognize that non-verbal communication also "speaks" loudly.

• Look at the speaker straight.
• Put aside distracting thoughts.
• Don't mentally prepare a rebuttal!
• Avoid being distracted past environmental factors. For instance, side conversations.
• "Listen" to the speaker's body language.

two. Prove That You're Listening

Use your own body language and gestures to prove that you are engaged.

• Nod occasionally.
• Grin and apply other facial expressions.
• Make sure that your posture is open up and interested.
• Encourage the speaker to continue with small verbal comments like aye, and "uh huh."

three. Provide Feedback

Our personal filters, assumptions, judgments, and beliefs can distort what we hear. As a listener, your role is to understand what is being said. This may crave y'all to reflect on what is being said and to ask questions.

• Reflect on what has been said by paraphrasing. "What I'1000 hearing is... ," and "Sounds similar you are proverb... ," are great means to reverberate dorsum.
• Enquire questions to clarify certain points. "What exercise you mean when you say... ." "Is this what you mean?"
• Summarize the speaker'due south comments periodically.

Tip:

If you notice yourself responding emotionally to what someone said, say so. And enquire for more than information: "I may not be understanding y'all correctly, and I discover myself taking what you said personally. What I thought you just said is XXX. Is that what yous meant?"

4. Defer Judgment

Interrupting is a waste of time. It frustrates the speaker and limits total understanding of the message.

• Permit the speaker to terminate each point before asking questions.
• Don't interrupt with counter arguments.

5. Answer Appropriately

Agile listening is designed to encourage respect and agreement. You are gaining information and perspective. You add nothing by attacking the speaker or otherwise putting her downwards.

• Be candid, open and honest in your response.
• Assert your opinions respectfully.
• Treat the other person in a way that you think they would want to be treated.

Infographic

Click on the thumbnail prototype below to meet Agile Listening represented in an infographic:

Key Points

It takes a lot of concentration and determination to be an active listener. Sometime habits are difficult to break, and if your listening skills are as bad as many people'southward are, and then you'll need to exercise a lot of work to break these bad habits.

There are v primal techniques you tin use to develop your agile listening skills:

1. Pay attention.
2. Show that you lot're listening.
3. Provide feedback.
4. Defer judgment.
5. Respond appropriately.

Showtime using active listening techniques today to become a better communicator, improve your workplace productivity, and develop amend relationships.

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Source: https://www.mindtools.com/CommSkll/ActiveListening.htm

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